Ok, It's Friday and I made plans to hang out with the "Hans" to hang out at the Emerald Tavern after work. I roll up to this bar and it seems pretty chill. Nice atmosphere, just like the "Winchester". I had to admit, I felt real comfy at the bar.
The bartender, This cute blond with the little gap between her teeth made think she was kinda freaky. I can't explain why I'm attracted to the who gap in the front teeth thing, but I am. Well, I had made double plans that night, Hang with Hans, and finally meet this girl who's been wanting to meet me for some time now.
I met this girl online and gave her a call and was quick to learn that she was coked up while talking to me, Just got her 3rd DWI two days prior, and was going to sun bathe on the deck of her house and smoke some weed.
I was kinda aprehensive to meet this girl. She was kind of wild and a major party chick. Well if you know me, I'm always up to party, and have a good time. But lately I've chilled out the past 5 months and have been focusing on other things more importantly like buying a house.
So in walks this girl. Half hawaian and spanish, She's built good, nice looks, but way too loud, even for me. She immediately grabs my face and plants a kiss on my lips, while digging her claws into my neck, I swear to god I thought she was going to draw blood. Expressing how happy she was to meet me finally. I introduce her to Hans and he's got this look on his face like, I'm in over my head. Well I was... lol.
She grabs my hand and thrusts it into her crotch and tells me to squeeze to prove she's not a man. ( I teased her saying she looked like a man in one of her pics ) Well, she definately wasn't a man... The crocodile Dundee test was complete.
This girl was constantly digging her nails into me, my face, my stomach, and my mommy/daddy buttons. Super loud she beckons for a shot of Rumplemintz, I had to get this shot to her quick to shut her the fuck up. I was actually a little embarassed to be around her. She sucks the shot glass dry and grabs me around the neck and tells me that she has to go to the bathroom. I was relieved at the moment, upon leaving she informs me that she'll be right back, and PUNCHES ME IN THE BOYS.
The look on my face, as the bartender walks by laughing at me asks what was wrong and I tell her what just happened and that I was scared she was coming back. This girl is no way near my type, but had to get the meet and greet over with. She comes back from the BR and tells me her friends that she came with are going back to Dead Freadie's and for me to meet her back there.
I express fake interest to get her away from me and the Hans and never show up. I was so scared that she was going to come back I was actually paranoid the entire rest of the night. Hans laughing with me, as he's that type of friend... the best kind to have by the way ! He just shakes his head and we share that silent moment in agreement. Sometimes I wonder if we share the same brain cuz we think alot almost all of the time.
These are the times that dating actually scares me. I plan on dating alot this coming year to find someone compatabile and grow from there. So if you know anyone looking to go on a date or hang out with that's single and normal. Let me know... But if she ends up being crazy, I'm coming back to kick you in the head... lol
1 comment:
Now you know, I would've enjoyed the clawing and stuff, but not being kicked in the nuts. I had one woman step on my nuts once with high heels, no thank you, not anymore. :)
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